Strangers Diary - Free Diary Online

I am really angry. This is because my parents seem to think that do things, just because my friends do them. Seriously? Just because I've turned 14 and went to high school, and all of my friends are not the best type of kids, it doesn't mean that I'm like that! Just because I hang out with them, doesn't mean that I will do the things that they do. Yes, I am more likely to want to do whatever stupid and dangerous thing my friends supposedly do, but I still have control over it in the end. Parents need to realize these things. The kids who get in trouble are the most fun to hang out with. But I can understand your concern. In a way.

i still try to deny it, but i do feel like i signed up for something for all the wrong (or mistaken) reasons. i keep on stumbling - mostly due to procrastination, self-doubt and very little inspiration. but im already too deep-set and have invested a lot of time and money on it, i might as well just finish it. i just want to get it over and done with and finally find what it is i am really looking for.

my dream.

my wanting to be known and loved by the world. i cant quite seem to grasp it. i dont know how to get where i want to be. its killing me. i'm not pretty enough or loud enough. i dont know if people will like me or my work. i dont know what to do or how to get my work known. I love making movies but i also want to be in movies and i love singing. But i dont know what to do about it all. i dont know how to become known.

my friend txted me and told me she's going to be in a music video that could end up on MTV. its way awesome.. but it kinda sucks. i've always wanted something like that to happen to me. Anyways, who cares?

...

Is it possible to love something too much?

It scares me sometimes.

The other times I just bask in the warm glow of happiness.

This obsession won't last forever. I know it.

We've run this thing into the ground, but here we go digging it up again. The pieces don't fit, but you push them into shape. And as we get deeper more pieces appear, with ragged edges that have morphed as they've waited to resurface. You try to tape them back together, but I tear them back apart and throw them in the hole. Shoveling dirt into the ground has never been so hard, but so needed. So get out of the hole, I'll give you a hand, before I bury you too.

I know I don't have the right to criticize, but shouldn't a person just be truthful about their emotions? And perhaps happy when someone is truthful with them? I get so confused about that.

People and their double standards puzzle the hell out of me.

So I have this friend, m, who my boyfriend does not like. I was friends with m way before I started talking to my boyfriend, and we flirted all the time. The flirting is kept to a minimum now, but my boyfriend still hates the guy. I'm not sure if I'm sposd to ignore my friend, or make my boyfriend accept him. He says that it doesn't bother him, but I know that it totally pisses him off. And when I talk to him and mention the guy, he just changes the subject, or makes up a reason to leave. I don't know how to handle this, but I know that I will remain close friends with both of them.

Saddest point of my day? Failing at figuring out a math equation to see how many 3" PlayPin balls I need to fill a 10X10 Room at 4 Feet deep......

I am well aware that letting myself eat hardly anything every day to lose weight is a horrible approach to weight loss. I lost 1 pound each day. I've lost 8 pounds and I'm down to 124. My mom still says I'm fat. When will I be thin in your eyes, mom? Don't you see that your words are LITERALLY killing me?

just when you think you won't find someone, when you feel like you're at your worst, remember things will look up. they have to. and they will. i promise.